Who do you want to be?

I love this phrase – when things don’t go right, turn left

We often think that turning right is the only way to turn, because everyone else is turning that way. The thing is, sometimes when things don’t go right, it’s because they don’t feel right and actually, the reason they don’t feel right is because deep down, we don’t really want to do them because these are actions which are not in line with our own personal values

Very sadly – a lot of us are living lives that other people have designed ...

Our friends and family, our school teachers, even podcasters and influencers on social media. How sad is that? In truth, quite a lot of us are sleepwalking through our own lives, being someone other people want us to be

I don’t know about you, but I am over being told how to live my life – look around and there is plenty of evidence that a lot of people are making poor life decisions right now – and yet the advice just keeps coming doesn’t it?

What this means is that we often feel buffeted about by life, we make decisions based on other people’s ideas of what seems right to them, and 5 years later, wonder why we don’t feel quite as fabulous as we thought we might, given everything we have achieved 

Guess what – we have something to share with you which might help you take the right turn for you

Have you ever heard of  ‘Congruence’ – I mean, outside of the maths class? Me neither, I had a vague idea, but I hadn’t really a clue what it meant…

Congruence is about…

1. the quality or state of agreeing, coinciding, corresponding
2. a correspondence in physical structure or thought; harmony
3. compatibility, accord, chime, consistency

The key things to take hold of about congruence are - being in harmony, in accord with / agreeing with - the harmony, accord, agreement is with our internal and external world

When we talk about world, we talk about the internal world of our thoughts, feelings, behaviour, mind-sets and beliefs - and how that belief is shown externally, how that mind-set is demonstrated externally, how that behaviour shows up externally, and how those feelings connect externally - to put it a different way - it is a life lived in harmony

So we start with a fundamental truth - true and real success is living a life in harmony - ensuring alignment and accord between our inner and outer worlds

It doesn't matter how much success we have externally, if it is not aligned with who we really are and who we really want to be, we don’t feel truly content – so we keep reaching for another goal, another achievement, another milestone, we sacrifice and strive and finally achieve that and… that feels empty too… so we reach for another – honestly we are like children reaching for another marshmallow!

The answer – is to own congruence. When we are congruent we live a life of harmony – we feel connected to our truest self

We are purposeful, mindful – our life is harmonious, we are consistently learning and stretching ourselves – frankly, life is good

Owning Congruence is about living your life in accordance with your beliefs and values, day by day, moment by moment, being in the driving seat of your own life - then you are believing in your self and the magic starts

When we are congruent we:

1. Make decisions faster – independently of other people
2. We have higher energy and motivation
3. We feel calm and confident that we are approaching life with integrity
4. We find life frictionless – even the really tough bits are somehow easier because we have a clearer sense of our own self
5. We feel in control of our own life – irrespective of uncertainty around us

We love this quote from Dolly Parton which sums up what we mean brilliantly,

"Find out who you are and do it on purpose"

So to help people find out who they are and do it on purpose - we created the Upskill (our name for a course/masterclass) ‘Owning Congruence’ - to equip and empower you to Own Congruence

Research from psychology, neuroscience, philosophy, and spirituality have been mined and sifted to create the diamonds that comprise the content in Owning Congruence

What we are sharing are the most useful and most practical tips and tools for you to live a life of harmony, purposeful rather purposeless, mindful rather than mindless - reconnecting with your true self - aligned and in accord between your inner and outer worlds (the things you believe in and the way you behave, the actions you take) 

And this is the real magic we all need in today’s uncertain world – as Stephen Covey said,

"Deep security comes from inside-out congruence, from living a life of integrity, in which our daily habits reflect our deepest values"

This is truly being in control, this is being in the driving seat of our own life, enabling you to take the right turn for you – whether that is turning left or right – you choose on your terms - this is the magic!

If you would like to discover more about how you can Own Congruence we have an Upskill (our name for a course/masterclass) to help you do just that – you can learn more about it here